The Fire-Pissing Bike Thief

Tonight as I was walking down the main sidewalk that runs along the beach in Santa Barbara with a couple friends, we witnessed the most pathetic act a human being can perform: thievery. I happened to have my digital camera with me, so here's an action shot of the villian.




We also passed by a sign later that night that fit really well into the situation that we witnessed. People who steal other people's things are truly a form of scum, and are ultimately morons in the end. There's a different kind of crime feel for stealing from a store or a big corporation, or stealing something large that's worth something. But stealing someone's radio or someone's bike is absolutely retarded. Get a life you idiots.

Is it really that hard to go get a job and stop being a poor fuck?? I have no respect or tolerance for people who refuse to help themselves from stuff that's as pathetic of petty thievery. And if you're going to steal something, put some effort and planning into it. Don't be a dumbass and act like an amateur.

The kid that we saw tonight looked to be around 18, and looked to be dismantling and stealing a bike that was evidently not his. Walking down the highly-lit sidewalk, we could hear the metallic clash that would end up being the handlebars clanging against the frame of the soon-to-be-stolen ride.

As we quickly approached, the idiot hastily jumped up from a crouched position and turned to face the beach with his hands in his pockets. He let a hugely obvious sigh and stood there on the edge of the sidewalk staring out towards the beach.

As if he didn't do enough to NOT conceal his mission the first time, we had to walk past him again minutes later on the way back to the car. He was still there, and again as we neared the bike we could hear the noise of him frantically trying to dismantle a lock of some sort. I had my camera ready on this time by, and took a blurry moving picture. I made sure to put my camera on a high-flash setting, and snapped a shot as we walked by, this time actually catching him with the handlebars in his hands, which were comically still connected to the frame and back tire via a chain lock. The flash shocked him for sure, but he still didn't leave the bike alone.

It's these kind of idiots that make me want to just end the lives of all of those that are absolutely meaningless and pathetic in this world. Hopefully this person will die young and I will feel better about the state of the poor part of our economy.

Anyways. Don't be a dirtbag.

Until next time.